How To Approach And Ask A Lady Out For The First Time: Follow These 5 Steps

Nana Osei Bonsu/ May 27, 2018/ Relationship & Dating Tips/ 0 comments

How to approach and ask a lady out for the  first time?This is a problem most guys encounter; it is a big hurdle to some. Is it your first time you are about to ask a lady out? Have you had some failed attempts already? Do not worry at all. Just follow these steps:

1. Be Confident.

Being confident is important when approaching a woman publicly; you just have to master courage and approach her. Women naturally like confident guys (read it here).

Before you approach her, bear in mind that you are a total stranger to her. She might behave weird but do not let that discourage you.

To be confident:

            Create an eye contact: If you meet somebody you’d wish to date, while conversing with her try and maintain an eye contact but remember, do not overdo it. Repeatedly maintaining an eye contact with a lady can give a signal that you desire to approach her.

            Smile: Can be a good way to tell her that you’re fascinated about her. If she returns the smile, that’s can signal that she admires you.

2. Compliment and flatter her:

Using a compliment can be a really smart advantage in approaching a lady, especially for the first time. You can start by complimenting her shoes, dress, etc. Most ladies love compliment and flatter. Even if you dislike her shoe colour, say you love it. You can be honest with her later when she becomes your fiancée and not at this stage. Be careful not to be too sexual in your compliment.

3. Chat and get to know her:

After being confident and approaching her, the next step is to get to know her well. You cannot ask someone out when you have no idea who he or she is.. If you try asking her out right after your first encounter with her, there is a high probability that she will reject it. Get in touch with her and be friendly or jovial :  This will enable her to know that you wish well for her. Just  be familiar with her and  avoid  the ‘friend zone’. If she becomes little familiar with you, it wouldn’t be a surprise to her if you ask her on a date.

Furthermore, at this stage, you have to check if she is already in a relationship. I don’t think you would want to date someone’s wife or fiancée. You can do this by checking if she is wearing a ring. You can also ask her whether she is already going out.

4. Ask her out on a date:

The next step is to ask her out on a date. There are numerous romantic ways of asking a lady out on a date. Just choose one that is suitable for you.

  1. If she is in the same city as you: Meet her in person and ask her out on a date. Pick a time that will favour her.

  2. If you met her through online/ dating site and she is out of state: You can do this via email, call or text message. Let her know that you want to go out with her. You don’t want to take a flight to her location only to be turned down! And please, don’t forget to choose a time that will favour her.

Take note, whatever you do, never leave a voicemail or a note asking her out. It is an unromantic way of asking someone out, and you wouldn’t know whether she got the message or not.

N/B: Remember that the worst-case scenario will be a decline, and you’ll probably never see her again.

5. Where and how to propose:

Before you propose, know what ladies want from a guy before they go out with them. Read it here:


After going on several dates with her, it is now time to propose or to let her know you want a relationship with her. Relationships require physical, emotional and financial commitment so take note of that.

            Where to propose: place you two first met, at cinema, in a train, picnic in a park, at work place, at a dinner etc. Just be creative!

         How to propose: radio/TV proposal, T-shirt Proposal, Candle lit Dinner, Banner Proposal and many more



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About Nana Osei Bonsu

Nana Bonsu is an Educationist who enjoys writing about relationships and romance. He also likes offering advice to people with relationship difficulties and hurdles.

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